Christopher tm Herdt (cherdt) wrote,
Christopher tm Herdt

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SUVs suck...but so do cars

The whole idea of operating a vehicle that weighs twenty times more than the cargo (i.e. driver) seems inefficient to the point of stupidity.

I like to belittle SUVs as much as the next guy. But fact is, the curb weight of a Ford Explorer (about 4000 pounds) is only 1000 pounds more than my Buick Skylark (about 3000 pounds and considered a compact sedan). Nearly every car driver deserves to be belittled.

At any rate, I had this terribly mean idea...

Print up little cards that say, "I can help save the planet without giving up luxury or convenience?" Inside is a small kraft-paper envelope marked "NEW all-natural formula fuel-additive guaranteed to reduce vehicle emissions. Just add contents to your tank next time you fill up!" The envelope is filled with dyed sugar.

Maybe I'll distribute them exclusively to SUVs with alumni stickers parked at U of M football games next fall, just to see how dumb some of my fellow graduates turned out to be.

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