Christopher tm Herdt (cherdt) wrote,
Christopher tm Herdt

Mama, why don't I have a face?

In Rittenhouse Square yesterday, around 4:30 P.M., near the statue of the goat, I saw a brown paper sack turned upside-down. It was emitting a low-tech computerized song. On the outside of the sack were written the words, "ADOPT ME."

I was curious, I'll admit. This is an area where a lot of families bring their small children to play. But I decided to pass it by. Maybe it was a child's toy, after all, that someone was trying to give away.

A well-dressed lady walking the other direction stopped abruptly. There was no hesitation, no curious glance: she stooped and picked up the sack. Underneath, there was a naked baby doll with a rubbery brain in place of a head, a little something like this:

Quebec, this is what your babies will look like once ONAN starts catapulting its waste over the border!

To my surprise, the lady picked it up! I had an inclination to follow her, but I was chilly and continued on home. I imagine the hideous prank was destined for the trash, but what if this lady adopted the creepy, crawling, cranially-deficient baby doll? Perhaps she later sat on her sofa, rocking and shushing the little cretin's 8-bit cries.

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 1 comment